How Whales DON'T Pass Gas!

I just read a funny story that a guy wrote about his co-worker. Here it is, slightly edited:

Barney was a decent but dim
 sort of guy. One afternoon, we were talking about 
whales and he seemed quite suspicious when I
 told him that whales weren’t fish and that they breathed air.


From here.

“Okay then, so how do they breathe underwater?”
 Barney asked.

“You know when they come up to the surface and
 squirt water in the air? Well that’s them 
breathing,” I said.

He looked at me like I was an idiot. “That’s not
 breathing!” he laughed. “That’s them FARTING.
 Their bums are on the top and they come up to
 fart! Didn’t you even know that?”

“Um... I’m
 pretty sure they’re breathing,” I replied, 
slightly stunned by this new information.


“Think about it,” he added slowly, so I’d 
understand, “if they didn’t come to the top
 when they farted, their butts would fill
 up with water and they’d sink.”

Pygmy right whale photo 

by Hadoram Shirihai and Brett Jarrett 

for Whales, Dolphins, and Other Marine Mammals of the World.