Ultra-Gross: What—you'd rather go acoustic?

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This electric guitar toilet seat is from Jammin' Johns.

Bart King: With an unofficial ranking of 87, Bart qualifies as one of America's Top 100 Barts. He’s a longtime social studies teacher with an MA in history who’s written over 30 books. Projects include a science fiction nove titled The Drake Equation (Disney), a 2021 Choose Your Own Adventure book called The Time Travel Inn, and a learned treatise on wordplay called Bad Dad Jokes: That’s How Eye Roll. In addition to editing and writing, Bart also reads a lot. Oh, and he likes turtles.

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