"Who wants to put their head in a jar?" "I do! I do!"

Hey, do you have a computer? A printer? A jar?
Then you can do this! 

Yes, it's an awesome "head in a jar"! 

Find out how to make it on mikeasaurus's Instructables page.

Want a slice of an anatomically correct head-cake?

Me either. Ooh, and here's a plate of appetizers in the shape of a human torso!

Only YOU Can Help Decapitate Radish People

The Telegraph

Root vegetables can grow in ways that are most horrible. Take this radish that Chinese gardener Bao Jiagen dug up. He thought it looked human, so he brought the revolting root to a farmers market. That’s where some potato brain pulled its head off. (“Kill the underground beast!”)

That reminds me of Noche de Rabanos (Night of the Radishes). This holiday has been celebrated for centuries in Oaxaca, Mexico on December 23. See, radishes were unknown to the region until Spanish explorers brought them back in the 1500s.

By Laura Ramos

Local farmers liked the look of the radishes, and started planting them. The problem was that nobody wanted to EAT the disgusting things. Since there were now piles of uneaten radishes sitting around, farmers started carving and combining the radishes into fun shapes to get people to come to their produce stands at the farmers markets. (Yes, they had farmers markets 500 years ago. That’s ALL they had!) 

People seemed to like it, so the farmers left their radishes in the ground longer and longer, giving the roots more time to grow into weird shapes.

So if you happen to be in Oaxaca later this month, you’ll notice that the city center has a number of elaborate scenes and displays showing radish people. And while you’re there, please tear the heads off of all those radish people. Otherwise, we’re all doomed!

SOMEBODY doesn't like Ronald McDonald!

McDonald's is a massive, world-wide company. Its a Goliath! And I think we can agree that its food isn't healthy.

In countries where people take good food seriously, McDonald's is NOT appreciated. Like Italy!

That's what inspired this 21st century sculpture of David taking on Goliath . . . and while I get the message, now I'm not in the mood for ANY food!

Photo by tomintaipei.

Gross Cake!

I thought that this mouse-cake made by the Hotham Street Ladies was the grossest one I'd ever seen:

But then I saw THIS cake by Barbara Jo, and I realized that the bar had been raised... or lowered!

As you can see, it appears to be a melting head. The step-by-step of how this ingenious cake was constructed can be read over at Do It Myself.

One of my favorite parts is when the skull is coated with raspberry jam!

Be Good for Goodness Sake...Or ELSE!

Photo by Baz Ratner

NOOO! What's that dreadful man done to Santa? Look, just because he didn't get the presents he wanted, that's not a good reason to be tearing the heads off of overweight, bearded men.

What's that— he's just assembling a holiday display? Never mind.

Holiday thanks to Robert Basler's Oddly Enough blog.

Edible Mummies and Headless Gladiators

"You want a piece of me?"

Yummy! A scientist named Richard Sugg says people ate mummies for a long time. More exactly, these people took mummies for medicine!

From the 1100s through the 1700s, doctors often had their patients eat ground-up mummy powder. Why would medical experts think it was smart to eat dried dead people? Look, mummies are so mysterious, it just seemed like eating them HAD to be healthy! Plus, maybe they thought that mummies were SO old, eating them wasn’t cannibalism.

In other news, archaeologists in England uncovered an ancient cemetery full of headless Romans! The skeletons date back to about 1,700 years ago, when the Roman Empire was still colossal. But while it’s too bad many had their heads cut off, at least some were buried WITH their detached noggins!

What’s interesting is that the skeletons have battle scars. And they came from mainland Europe, NOT England. So the theory was that these the headless Romans were soldiers.

But other evidence showed the dead men had one arm that was stronger than the other. Okay, so they probably swung a sword or axe with that one! Ah, but one body had tooth marks from a lion or bear, which suggests a gladiator.

Ancient beheaded gladiators? That’s pretty cool!

Top photo from National Geographic,

article from the Guardian.

bottom photos and article 

from York Archaeology (via).

Please: Don't Talk on the Phone While Pooping!

Before I explain that title, first I have to say that pink skulls are for girls. Don't believe me? Just look!

See, it says so right on the package!

I saw the pink skull at the finest toy story in Portland, Finnegan's Toys & Gifts. While there, I also spotted some bandages in the shapes of pickles and toast. They're not exactly disgusting...but they ARE cool!

But I know what you're here for, so here's a gross story. From Finnegan's, I went down to Powell's Books. After seeing if they had a copy of The Big Book of Gross Stuff (they did!), I went into a bathroom and stepped up to a urinal.

"Dude, what's going on?" said a deep voice.

Surprised, I looked around.

"I'm at Powell's right now," the voice continued. "Just looking at books and stuff."

Looking left, I located the source of the voice. It was some guy sitting in a stall, pooping, and talking on the phone! This is disgusting for a number of reasons. First, poop germs were probably landing on his phone even as he spoke.

And I also felt sorry for the person on the other end of the conversation. Who wants to TALK to some applehead when he's pooping?

Not me. I also don't want to LISTEN to it, so I washed my hands and got out of there! The only reason to stick around would have been in the hope that he'd drop his cellphone into the toilet. But what are the odds of THAT happening?

Our neighbors get a little carried away this time of year...

First, they embrace the spirit of Halloween...

...then they decapitate it!
I walk quickly past this house...with my head down. :)

Joey Williams shows off a blue whale skull!

In the photo below, cool guy Joey Williams stands next to the skull of a blue whale.

"Who IS Joey Williams?" you ask? I just told you...he's the guy next to the whale skull!

Photo from here. 

Behold...the Meat Head!

Andy Oakland is a genius. How else could he have figured out how to make an edible head out of meat in five easy steps?

If you find yourself having any trouble with Andy's instructions (which are over here at Make: Projects), then I know just the guy who you could ask for help.

Brad Slaughter picture

by GreenGhost21.

Saints Carrying Their Heads!

Have you ever wanted to become a saint? One popular route to saintdom is to be a REALLY GOOD person and then have your head chopped off for it. Sadly, this opportunity doesn’t come up much, but back in the old days, it happened all the time!

Decapitated saints are shown in LOTS of statues and paintings. Artists must love this, since they get to show the saint’s body holding its head! There are so MANY examples of this, there is even a word for them: cephalophore (meaning “head carrier”)!

Usually, cephalophores just carry their own heads, like Saint Denis (top & below right). According to Denis's story, after having his head chopped off, he picked it up and then walked for miles, preaching the whole way. Talk about distracting!

St. Denis: If I could have your attention—

Me: Blimey! He’s carrying his own head!

St. Denis: Right, but if you could just focus—

Me: This guy’s got his whole NOGGIN in his hands!

St. Denis: Perhaps I’ll go talk to THESE people…

There are also female head carriers. But since they’re so dainty, they need assistance carrying their noggins, as is the case with Saint Valerie.

Oh, and you don’t actually HAVE to be a saint to be a cephalophore, as the poet and thief Bertran de Born shows us here.

I think the weirdest cephalophore I’ve seen so far is Saint Alban. In this painting, he is holding his head…and looking down at it with ANOTHER head!

Credits:

Thanks to Dr. Michael Milone for the brainstorm! Top image of Saint Denis from here. Below him is the Bishop of Paris, from here. The images of Saint Denis next to the dialogue, Saint Valerie, and Saint Alban from here. The shot of Betran de Born is on the Wikipedia page on this subject here.

“This skull bone’s connected to the YUM bone!”

"The skull! It burns!"

The idea of the Nomskull is that you fill a skull mold with batter and then bake a skull-shaped cake. (I can’t tell if the brain part is frosting that got squirted on later, but it sort of looks like it.)

Speaking of yummy heads, here’s an interesting dish being served at the Comic Con in San Diego. Jar-Jar Binks never looked more delicious!

Photo from REUTERS’ Oddly Enough Blog.

Frozen Head-Headline:

An Iowa man named Orville Richardson died last year. In his will, Orville wanted to have his head cut off and frozen, in case he could be brought back to life in the future. (You know, like in The Simpsons or Futurama?) 

But Orville’s family just buried him with his head still attached…so now a judge has ordered that Orville be dug up and decapitated! (His body will be re-buried and Orville's head is going to be frozen.) Full story here.

When Cheese-Heads Get Hot

Let's say that you really like Apple products. You've got iMacs, iPhones, and iPods...so you just can't wait to hear Apple leader Steve Jobs announce the new iPad!

But you HAVE to wait, so while you kill time, you make a cheese-head of Steve Jobs!

That's what Ken from The Cook's Den did. And actually, I'm not even sure his mozzarella head is gross...or at least, it wasn't until Ken heated the cheese for his Spicy Steve Nachos Supreme recipe!

On Second Thought, I'm NOT in the Mood for Pie

"Help me! I've fallen in this pie!"

"Harold, you fool! That's a Quicksand Pie— you're doomed!!"

"I'm getting weaker... weaker... Say, is this real pumpkin or canned pumpkin?"

From Life magazine, 1949.

Why the Benin Empire Never Had Tourists

There was once a nation in west Africa known as the Benin Empire. (It was where Nigeria is today.) This was its flag:

Sheesh! That must be the least friendly flag ever invented in the history of flag-dom!

Swedish Elevator Warning

Translation: "Dangerous to transport goods in elevators without inner door."

So if a person gets in with a bin and doesn't pull it back from the elevator's edge, his head will get squished like a grape with a brain in it!

With This Cake, I Commit First-Degree Murder

It’s funny, I never thought that a cake could be gross. Sure, if you eat too many pieces, you can FEEL gross, but that’s different!

But bakers are a strange breed. And they decided that if a couple can have a cutesy-wutesy wedding cake, why not have a divorce cake showing a darker side of human nature?

Ooh, here's another good one.

That's one long, brutal fall!

Divorce cakes from over here.

Man. Baby. Manbabies?!

I'm not sure if this is even gross, but it sure is creepy. The idea behind this is horribly simple: Take a photograph of a man and a baby.

Then swap their heads!

The results are freaking me out right now— oh good grief, here's another one...

More manbabies can be viewed at Manbabies.com.