"Not all heroes wear capes"

Via argentina89.

Hey, knock that off, Aquaman!

Four reasons why Superman can't punch somebody into outer space.

I've been thinking about superheroes since my book, The Big Book of Superhero Stuff, is coming out in near-ish future. So I read an article by Rhett Allain with interest. He's a wise fellow who figured out that Superman CAN'T punch someone into outer space...and some of the reasons are even gross! 

1. If you account for air resistance, the faster you start the greater the air resistance force. I
2. Even if Superman did hit someone super-hard, Superman’s fist would probably just go through the target’s head.
3. By pushing so hard on someone, Superman’s feet would crush the ground under him.
4. The acceleration of the victim would be so great that his head would come off.

BONUS! Here's one of Rhett's amazing illustrations:

"My Spidey sense is tingling! Rats. No more toilet paper."

You have to see all the pictures to appreciate this Spiderman-themed bathroom.

The bathroom makes it look like Dr. Octopus is coming through the wall while you're trying to bust a grumpy.

Beware SuperVáclav!

In the Czech Republic, a man decided to put an end to the injustices he saw around him. So he got a superhero outfit and named himself SuperVáclav and decided to go after society’s worst criminals: People who walk their dog and don’t bother picking up their poop.

What are your thoughts about the way SuperVáclav deals with them?

Whatever your opinion, I like that when the dog owner starts chasing SuperVáclav, the dog does too. It seems to find the whole thing a lot of fun!

My Spidey-Sense is tingling—

—and it's telling me that something is wrong!

This junior Spiderman ("Spiderboy"?) sitting on a toilet and reading a book seems okay...


...and there's no problem with this Spiderman toilet seat...

But it looks like someone's trying to muscle in on the Spiderman toilet paper!

"Hulk smash...and wipe!"

He's faster than a speeding bullet— oh, YUCK.

Here at Ultra-Gross, we usually skip the grisly and gruesome…but we’re happy to make an exception here!

Artist Marcus Wittmers created this sculpture, titled “Even Heroes have Bad Days.” It’s part of the “Heroes, Freaks and Superrabbis” exhibition at Berlin’s Jewish Museum. (Who knew? Superman is a Superrabbi!)

Photo by Thomas Peter for REUTERS.