Spit Stops Fire!

Spitting tobacco juice is an American tradition. (A bad American tradition.) Heck, politicians have been spitting tobacco juice all over the place since the country got started. But even if there are spittoons nearby, you're as likely to miss your shot as to hit it. That's why an 1837 news story told of the dangers of slipping and falling on the House of Representatives’ floor. It was covered with a “disgusting compound of tobacco juice, wafers and sand.” Blech!

But thank goodness that Gerald Shelton of Wisconsin practices the all-American habit of spitting! When a meanie went into his house and tried to set it on fire, the flames melted Shelton’s plastic spittoon. Out flowed a heroic mix of spit and tobacco juice. The phlegmy liquid put the fire out and saved the day! Three cheers for spitting: Hip hip, ach-tooey! (Repeat two more times.)