Quote Board!

"You can get me to crap a pineapple. But you can't get me to crap a cactus."

—President Ronald Reagan, 1982

Gives a new meaning to "He has his head up his butt"!

Pick this video up at 0:28 for this gem:

"No one, however smart, however well educated, however experienced, is the suppository of all wisdom." 

—Tony Abbott, Australian politician 

Good doggie!

"Intimidating is going up to a growling Rottweiler and having to squeeze his anal glands . . . That's intimidating. I think I can handle Congress."

—Representative Ted Yoho (Florida), saying his days as a large animal veterinarian prepared him for his new job in Congress.

Pop Quiz!

What person said the following:

“I do not take offense when you pour diarrhea on me day in and day out, and yet you have taken offense.”

A. U.S. Presidential wannabe Mitt Romney
B. U.S. President Barack Obama
C. Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin

Click “read more” to find out!

Canadian election posters are scary.

Although now that I look at it more closely, it looks like a troll did a poster-bomb!

Feeling the Pressure!

As the leader of the United Kingdom, David Cameron is used to making difficult decisions and giving important speeches.

And when he does, his recipe for success is to need to pee. Where did he get this idea? Apparently, he’d been impressed by something that famous broadcaster Enoch Powell said. When asked why he only gave speeches on a full bladder, Powell said:

“You should do nothing to decrease the tension before making a big speech. If anything you should seek to increase it.”

I guess the theory is that if there’s lots of pressure INSIDE, you won’t feel the pressure OUTSIDE. So next time you have to give a speech, be sure to chug lots of apple juice so that you'll have a full bladder!

Stories here and here.

Nick Clegg toilet seat cover?

Over at Amazon.co.uk, there is supposedly a toilet seat cover for sale with British politician Nick Clegg's face on it. This seems sort of mean, plus the photo looks fake, but I do sort of like this user review:

Upon delivery, my youngest child (Jerome) could barely contain his excitement at seeing our favourite . . . politician taking his new home next to our beloved cistern - I recall with great mirth how he even forced out an unecessary waste biscuit just to be the first one to touch Nick's face "on offishal bizness Daddy"... bless his little soul.

Democrats. Republicans. Independent Party-ers. Everybody Poops.

This politically poopy design is available as a T-shirt from Threadless Tees.

And they even have it as a baby's onesy, which makes sense!

Mitt Romney and the Diarrhea of Seamus

From the Boston Globe

Politico has an article about Mitt Romney and his dog, Seamus. It goes like this:

In 1983, Romney packed up his family into a station wagon for a 12-hour trip from Boston to Ontario. Before starting, Romney put Seamus, the family’s Irish setter, in a dog carrier and attached it to the station wagon's roof rack. 
Was this cruel? The Boston Globe says Romney built a special windshield for the carrier, “to make the ride more comfortable for the dog.”



By Natasha d.H.

But poor Seamus must NOT have been comfortable, because he began to have horrible diarrhea. From the Boston Globe: 

As the oldest son, Tagg Romney commandeered the way-back of the wagon . . . he glimpsed the first sign of trouble. 

 ‘Dad!’ he yelled. ‘Gross!’   

A brown liquid was dripping down the back window, payback from an Irish setter who'd been riding on the roof in the wind for hours.

 As the rest of the boys joined in the howls of disgust, Romney coolly pulled off the highway and into a service station. There, he borrowed a hose, washed down Seamus and the car, then hopped back onto the highway.

What's unsaid is that Romney apparently put the dog back in the carrier, where it rode for the rest of whatever was left of their 12-hour trip. Yeesh.

Poopy Politics

There were lots of funny signs at Jon Stewart's Rally to Restore Sanity in Washington D.C. Like this one!

Photo by Jeff Snyder/PictureGroup via AP Images

There Are Acceptable Ways to Protest...

...but this is NOT one of them!

This protester from Argentina needs to learn a more persuasive way to argue his point. (And no, I'm not talking about going #2!)

Photo from REUTERS.

No Cake for Me, Thanks

In the Florida town of Bonita Springs, the urinals in the men's room have a strange look: The face of a political candidate named Pat McCourt!


But who would be mean and nasty enough to put a picture of someone inside of a urinal cake? In this case, that would be the opponents of political candidate Pat McCourt!

Full story here. 

Politician Knows How to Clean Up Dookie!

In 2008, Alaska politician Diane Benson ran for the U.S. House of Representatives. To prove that she was brave, tough, and could clean up messes, this was Diane's political ad:

Did you see that? She cleaned up dog poop! Good work, Diane. I'd have voted for you, but I don't live in Alaska. (But I like the trombone soundtrack!)

For Those About to Be Grossed Out, We Salute You!

I guess if you’re easily grossed out, you wouldn’t be reading this blog. But do people who get disgusted have anything in common?

Yes! It turns out that the most easily grossed out are usually:

1.) Younger. Old people have seen it all before!

2.) Female. Men aren’t grossed out as easily as women.

3.) Conservative! This was a surprising one for me to learn. But in two different studies, it was found that people who are politically conservative were MORE likely to be grossed out!

Weird! This is NOT a political blog, so follow this link for study details. And if you get grossed out easily, don’t worry. The Big Book of Gross Stuff isn’t disgusting at all. The title is a joke! The book is mostly about flowers and kittens. (Mostly.)

Party-Pooping Protesters

There was a big protest in Taiwan last month. For six years, it has been illegal to import U.S. beef into the country. This ban was created out of fear of importing "mad cow disease."

But now the ban is over. And from the look of that gigantic inflatable poop, somebody is unhappy about it!

Photo from Reuters.