How to Make Fake Poop!

This idea for DIY fake poop is so simple and awesome, it's sheer genius. And like all my genius ideas, someone else came up with it!

In this case, I learned about DIY fake poop from The Bearded Iris blog. And with Iris Beard's permission, let's get to it!

1.) Get an empty toilet paper roll and a bowl of water.

2.) Unroll the toilet paper roll and submerge it underwater until it's soggy.

Let it get REALLY soggy. Soggified!

3.) When you think it's soggy enough, remove the toilet paper roll and start squeezing it into a poop shape.

Squeeze! Nobody's ever made good poop without squeezing. Okay, let's see what you've got.

What?! You call THAT poop? Keep squeezing! Put some elbow grease into it!

4.) Okay, now let's see what you've got.

Oh, NICE. Now you can sit back and enjoy the applause of people who admire your fake poop!

WARNING I: Someone may praise your DIY poop by saying, "It's turd-tacular!" If this happens, give that person 50 cents for being brave enough to say something that cheesy.

WARNING II: If you don't want to go to all this trouble making DIY fake poop, no big deal. After all, you make DIY real poop every day!

Thanks again to The Bearded Iris for the brilliant instructions and photos!