I just heard a story from someone code-named
biscuitbiscuit. It involves
bird poop. And it made me laugh:
Got back to my car after a long
day at work, only to discover an enormous bird
poop right in the middle of my windshield. I had
nothing to clean it off with— no
water, no tissues, no scraper, nothing. But I
couldn't have driven as I wouldn't have been
able to see anything.
So I cleaned the bird poop off with
my hand.
Then, as I pulled out my keys, I had a
bizarre moment of brain-fade and thought “What's
that all over my hand?” and cheerfully licked it
to find out.
This was followed by hacking, gagging and
spitting to try and get the bird poop out of my
mouth! I am an idiot. An idiot who was lucky not
to be ill. An idiot who was also very lucky not
to be seen by anyone!
That must have been the worst day of your life.
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