Stretch (and retch?) Armstrong

Back in the 1970s, Stretch Armstrong was an action figure that could be contorted into various shapes. Stretching Stretch was fun enough, but he would always get a tear and start leaking some weird, scary goop.

But I just learned from a book titled Whatever Happened to Pudding Pops? that the goo was actually corn syrup. Yep, the same sweet stuff that's in soft drinks! The authors state:

Most kids quickly figured out that a bleeding Stretch Armstrong was a delicious Stretch Armstrong. And if you claim never to have tasted Stretch's sweet, syrupy middle, then you, sir, are a liar.

What?! How DARE you! I never sucked my action figures. So there!

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