Only YOU Can Help Decapitate Radish People

The Telegraph

Root vegetables can grow in ways that are most horrible. Take this radish that Chinese gardener Bao Jiagen dug up. He thought it looked human, so he brought the revolting root to a farmers market. That’s where some potato brain pulled its head off. (“Kill the underground beast!”)

That reminds me of Noche de Rabanos (Night of the Radishes). This holiday has been celebrated for centuries in Oaxaca, Mexico on December 23. See, radishes were unknown to the region until Spanish explorers brought them back in the 1500s.

By Laura Ramos

Local farmers liked the look of the radishes, and started planting them. The problem was that nobody wanted to EAT the disgusting things. Since there were now piles of uneaten radishes sitting around, farmers started carving and combining the radishes into fun shapes to get people to come to their produce stands at the farmers markets. (Yes, they had farmers markets 500 years ago. That’s ALL they had!) 

People seemed to like it, so the farmers left their radishes in the ground longer and longer, giving the roots more time to grow into weird shapes.

So if you happen to be in Oaxaca later this month, you’ll notice that the city center has a number of elaborate scenes and displays showing radish people. And while you’re there, please tear the heads off of all those radish people. Otherwise, we’re all doomed!